The trumpet’s call

Security was tight.

Police crowded around The Thomas & Mack Center in Paradise, Nevada, anticipating what was sure to be a hotbed for protesters.

Truth to be told, what took place here was an important move for Donald Trump. Having taken full control of the Republican primary, and feeling more power than he’s ever had in his entire career as a ‘businessman’ he felt it was time to make that gamble.

He had all the chips, why not go all in, in the “gambling capital of the world”.

The crowd roared as Trump waddled his way to the stage, waving one hand in the air and doing the ‘finger gun’ with the other. Was he pointing at anyone in particular? There’s been a lot of talk in the news for the past couple of weeks, police were investigating a series of violent acts that were potentially linked to Trump’s rallies.

He assures the press that they’re all ‘just having a good time.’

Republican-presidential-hopeful-Donald-Trump-is-interviewed-by-ABC-News-on-June-16-2015.-ABC-News-800x430“Nevada, my people!” Trump shouted into the microphone. The crowd continued to roar incoherently. Trump raised his hand in the air, and slowly lowered it. The crowd answered his authority and got quieter.

“Nevada, I gotta tell you. It’s good to be here, it really is. There’s good people here in Nevada. How are we doing today? We good?”

The crowd roared again, that always got Trump a little giddy. For the first time in his life, he felt the confidence to do a little bit of a locomotion dance in front of a crowd of thousands. Finally, something off of his bucket list.

“Nevada, you’re great. Trust me, the best people live here. But shut up for a second. I have some THINGS that I want to say.”

Trump waved his dainty fingers in the air, until the crowd once again shut up. He pulled the podium microphone closer to his face.

“First of all, isn’t this amazing? The American people have spoken ladies and gentleman. They’ve spoken for me to speak for you.”

The crowd is ready to cheer again, but he raised his hand to tell them not to. A little bit of stink-eye for good measure.

“It’s truly an honour ladies and gentlemen truly an honor,” Trump wipes the sweat from his brow. Nevada was hot this time of year, and he only stood in front of the mini fridge for 5 minutes, “The air conditioning in this place is a real travesty in this place. Who can I talk to about this? Somebody better fix it before we’re done here.”

Some people in the crowd weren’t sure if they were supposed to clap.

“Anyway anyway,” Trump continued, “You people have been good to me, so good. Did you know, this is true I heard this. People love me so much, there’s fan fiction about me? It’s wonderful I read it on the internet, it’s a good read…”

U.S. Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump speaks at the Family Leadership Summit in Ames

Trump was referring to a fanfiction titled “Until the end of time” which was a crossover involving Anne Frank, historical figure who was a victim of the Holocaust and Goku from Dragon Ball Z. Something that existed on the internet for many years, but had recently been re-written to replace every mention of Adolf Hitler with Donald Trump. It was big on the internet for a while, that’s how he knew about it. Otherwise he never read it.

“… I think I’m the hero in it,” Trump’s lips pursed and he looked up at the ceiling wondering what to say next.

“Anyway, anyway. We did a lot this year, and you people made it happen. You should be proud. Be proud. We fought off those pussies who called themselves protesters. And you all did your part to kick those unwanted freeloaders out of American homes! Fun right? We’re tough again America!”

Trump raised a fist in the air. The crowd chanted “USA! USA!” Trump spun and clicked his heals in the air.

“YES!” He shouted.

“Love it, you people are amazing. Who needs the army when I have you guys huh? Honest, hard working Americans!” With a couple of polite nods, he composed himself in-front of the podium. Adjusted the microphone in front of his face once again and cleared his throat.

It was time to do the thing.

“So you know, we have fun here. You know that. Everyone has fun with me, we laugh we smile it’s just… fun. We chuckle as we all raise our hands in the air and pledge to vote. You’re out there crippling protesters left and right, it’s all in good fun. But now… now I want to get very serious for a second, and I want you all to listen to me.”

The crowd went quiet.

“Now assuming you all didn’t rustle around too much, there should be a glass of juice underneath everyone’s chairs,” he pulled a glass of his own from within the podium, “it looks a lot like this, kinda orangish… or red depending on your lighting. I want everyone to check now.”

Trump watched in anticipation as the gleam of thousands of glasses lifted into the air.

this-is-the-one-thing-that-sets-donald-trump-apart-from-other-negotiators“I don’t want anyone holding out on me,” he snarked, “I’m about to very serious with you all and I need the confidence of my supporters. Can you do that for me?”

One lone voice in the far back of the arena could be heard, “We’re with you all the way Trump!” The crowd cheered almost immediately.

“Good! That’s good to hear,” said Trump as he nodded, “This is… what you have in your hands right now is a pledge. I want all of you to pledge with me–we’re doing this together. If any of you are going to vote for me, Then I want you to drink the entire thing.”

He put his glass down.

“I’m not thirsty right now, I’ll save it for later. But I’m going to count. We’re going to count together, and you’re going to drink.”

The crowd just looked on, waiting for the instruction. Trump had their full confidence.

“One. Two… THREE!” Trump clapped his hands together. As far as his eyes could see, every single person pounded back the juice, held their glasses in the air and cheered.

“That’s good juice huh? That’s good juice. I’d have some myself if I were thirsty myself, but listen. I want to thank you guys again. YOU GUYS! You are the reason why we are making America great again.”

At that moment, the audience fell to the floor, one after the other, as Trump continued on.

“I’m making America great again…”

Back in CNN Headquarters, Anderson Cooper stands dumbfounded in front of a giant screen. Trump continuing to talk to a silent, motionless crowd. Cooper’s dead stare locked on the camera in front of him, as information was desperately being fed into his earpiece.

“Um, more on this story as it continues to develop. Please, stay tuned in to CNN for more election coverage…”

Tump-Donald

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